Hiccup and the Housekeeper
by GreatMarta
Summary: 5-year-old Hiccup asks his father's housekeeper if she's his mom. [repost from AO3] [part of "Hiccup at large" series, but can be read separately]


"Rhea, are you my mom?"

The young woman, who had been leaning over the tub with a washboard in her hand and a shirt in the other, looked up, wide-eyed. The 5-year-old boy in front of her was waiting for a response. He had this troubled expression, filled with longing for an answer, but also fear of pursuing it. He must have understood he had a remarkable talent for making adults feel uncomfortable. Though "uncomfortable" did not even begin to describe how Rhea felt right now.

"No," she said, sensing it was thin ice she was stepping on. "Why would you think that?"

The boy shifted nervously. "Well, you come here every day," he said shyly. "You clean our house. Wash our clothes. Make us dinner. Watch over me. That's what moms do, right?"

Rhea sighed. Children and their simple view of the world. "Not all women who do such things are moms, Hiccup," she explained, trying to get back into the rhythm of scrubbing. With a little bit of luck, the boy will realize she is busy and leave her alone.

Apparently, he did not take the hint. "What would you have to do to become my mom?"

Rhea froze. She hoped the blush she could feel on her face was not that striking to Hiccup. She should not be having this conversation with him. If he misunderstands anything she says and repeats it to his father, she might as well throw herself into the fire.

"I…" she hesitated. "I can't be your mom, Hiccup. You can only have one mother and one father," This seemed innocent enough. Nothing he could twist. Hopefully. It was Hiccup after all.

"But I only have a dad," insisted the boy, his determination rising. "I also have Gobber, but he isn't a mom. You could be one."

Rhea rolled her eyes. She had no idea what it was about her that inspired the boy's trust, but she prayed to gods they'd limit it somehow.

"I. Could. Not," she muttered, her strengths leaving her. "You had a mother, Hiccup. You cannot have another one. Sorry."

The boy seemed intrigued with this new piece of information. Much to her despair.

"I had a mom?" he asked, surprised.

"Yes," confirmed Rhea, making a mental list of favors she was going to demand off Stoick once he gets back. "She was stolen by a dragon when you were just a baby. Taken away. Abducted. This is why you don't have a mom."

Hiccup's eyes widened. "Stolen? Like a sheep?"

"Yes," nodded Rhea, "Like a sheep. By a dragon. And dragons never return what they took. Your mom won't be coming back," she added, hoping the message was clear enough. She 'd rather not get into details as to how dragons devour their prey.

Hiccup was deeply saddened by what he's heard. And apparently masochistic, as he still longed for more. "But why would a dragon take my mom?" he asked.

"Because that's what dragons do," groaned Rhea in annoyance. This much the kid should know, even at five. Honestly.

"But why?" cried the boy, coming closer and grabbing Rhea's leg. "Why my mom? What did she do? Why are dragons so mean? We didn't do anything to them!"

It took all of Rhea's willpower not to scream in frustration. She forced herself to push the tub aside and pull the boy closer. She had to be nice. She had to manage this mess. She will not be beaten by a 5-year-old.

"I don't know, Hiccup," she told him calmly. "Dragons are not like us. They don't think. All they know is violence and terror. There is nothing we can do about it," then, to lighten the mood, she threw in a cheerful remark. "But I guess dragons have a sense of esthetics. That dragon must have taken your mom, because she was the prettiest woman he could see. I'm sure of it."

Personally, Rhea has always thought Hiccup's mother insane. Still, she couldn't deny that the woman had been quite a looker.

Hiccup looked up, wet with tears, but hopeful. "Really?"

"Really," nodded Rhea, managing a smile. She hoped it would do.

The boy smiled weakly in return. But his smile dropped a mere second later.

"Rhea, but that means you are in danger too!" he exclaimed, terrified.

Rhea blinked in surprise. "Huh?"

"If my mom was very pretty, and a dragon took her, and you are very pretty, a dragon can take you too!" explained the boy, panicking. "Rhea, I don't want a dragon to take you too! I don't want to!"

He clung onto her, releasing a new load of tears. And she stared at him, shocked. And then, slowly, reached out to pat his back. Feeling her own eyes sting.

She didn't really like this child. He was a disgrace to his father's name. A pathetic runt, nothing Stoick the Vast should have sired. Always running around, touching everything and making a mess she had to clean. Always asking stupid questions. This kid was driving her insane.

But not this time. This time he was striking her right in the heart.

"Hush, Hiccup," she told him gently. "I will not be taken by a dragon. I promise."

She shouldn't be making such promises. But it seemed fitting somehow.

Hiccup looked up. "You promise?" he asked through tears.

"Sure," Rhea gave him a confident smile. In all honesty, if a raid happened, she was much more likely to die on the ground. There was no doubt she would be keeping that promise.

Hiccup beamed and hugged her tightly. She hugged him back, congratulating herself on solving the crisis. She really was getting good at this. She had no reasons to worry.

"Rhea?"

"Hmh?"

"I love you."

The woman chuckled. It seemed that she has gained a valuable ally.


End file.
